The Holidays are upon us! They were officially kicked off on Thanksgiving Day. That is the day that families get together and have a big turkey dinner. They sit together watching the parade or old Christmas movies and conversing, as the aroma of the turkey cooking makes its way into the living room and all through the house, its warmth making everyone feel comforted and happy. That has always been my favorite part of Thanksgiving. Those few minutes with your loved ones around you, with the children playing. Those few moments before I need to get up and prepare the finishing touches for the meal. Such wonderful happy times.

     But times do change, children grow up and sometimes move away. In my case we are the ones that moved away. A year and a half ago, we moved to Mississippi. My husband wanted to go home to his roots, so we began a new chapter in our lives. Mother was living with us and was in fairly good health for it was summer time, and that is when we decided to make our big move. In her younger days, she loved to travel cross country, meeting people and seeing the sights, so we planned our move all around mom. We planned to drive cross country so she could, once again, do what she loved to do most, travel. We drove out of the driveway of our house in California at 9:00 am on a Monday morning and started our cross country move to Mississippi. My husband drove the moving van ahead of us, while my mother and I followed in the truck, with our dogs, Pooch and Misty, sitting in the back seat. I often think back to these wonderful memories. This would be Mom's last cross country trip. Looking back, I am so glad we did it this way. Mom and I had the time of our lives traveling together in the truck.

     As fall came around, her health started to fail. With our children and family celebrating Thanksgiving in California, the three of us spent a wonderful Thanksgiving in our new house in Mississippi. Little did I realize that this would be our last Thanksgiving together. Thanksgiving Day is my favorite day of the whole year. The turkey baking in the oven seems to give the house a warm glow, as its aroma travels throughout. This is the one day of the year that families take the time to be together, instead of rushing through their days, all going in different directions. This is the one day of the year that we give thanks for being together, for having each other. This is the one day of the year where everything else can wait. That last Thanksgiving Day with my mom, I cooked the same exact meal that I had cooked every other Thanksgiving. I followed the same pattern, as every thought and every movement had a tradition all of its own. Again, as in Thanksgivings past, everything, except for the last minute preparations was ready, and we watched the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade, as we conversed and enjoyed each other's company.

     Mother passed away the following July. As fall approached and I watched the leaves start to drop off the trees, I knew that Thanksgiving Day would soon be here. This time it would be so very different. Tradition had broken. The old days were over. This would be a time to start new traditions, but how? As the day drew closer, I knew that this year I would not be able to cook that wonderful dinner with that wonderful warm aroma wafting through the house. This year my house would not have that warm comforting glow. This year I would have to make other arrangements, maybe even go to a restaurant. All I knew is that I could not bear the thought of cooking a wonderful Thanksgiving Dinner without my family, especially without my mother. Those wonderful memories all of a sudden were so terribly painful.

     But God had a plan. He would not leave me alone that day, and I was yet to realize that. It just so happened that I had become involved in a ministry at an assisted living complex a few weeks before Thanksgiving. Every Monday evening, a few of us go to to the clubhouse and we have a little church service and bible study with some of the residents. We sing songs, followed by the lesson. We even have special music. After our little service is over, some of the ladies have a meal already prepared for us and we eat and have wonderful fellowship. Needless to say, I have become acquainted with quite a few of those folks. There is Mr. Eugene, who is confined to a wheelchair, and he tells marvelous stories. He is always so happy. He tells me he can sing “Halleluyah Square” and every week I tell him that he will sing the special music the following Monday, but he always finds an excuse to get out of it. Mr. Eugene is my favorite. He is always happy and so caring. I love the fact that he still dearly loves his wife, who passed away ten years ago. He talks about her as if she were sitting right beside him. Every one of them is special. Some are happy, some are talkative, some are quiet, and some are even grumpy.

     Well, the days went on, one by one, and on one of those Mondays, they announced that they would be having Thanksgiving Dinner at the clubhouse. I was ecstatic! I suddenly realized that yes, I could spend a meaningful and happy Thanksgiving with people that I have grown to love! I immediately blurted out, “Can I come?!” One of the grumpy ladies in the bunch then commented, “Well, she just invites herself anywhere, doesn't she?” Everyone else said I would be welcome. I offered to bring something, but was told just to bring the drinks, which I did. I certainly felt uncomfortable attending Thanksgiving Dinner empty handed.

     The big Thanksgiving Day came, where I would be having Thanksgiving Dinner with my new friends. I was so looking forward to it. And I knew that had been a blessing from God. He had given me this brand new ministry, making it possible for me not to be alone on Thanksgiving Day. I happily made my way there early that afternoon. The most wonderful dinner in the entire world was waiting there. I loved serving those in wheelchairs, as the ladies so reminded me of my mom. We talked, we laughed, and we ate. We spent a wonderful afternoon together. Little did I know that the best was yet to come.

     I really had not given any thought that there might be folks confined to their apartments, for want of not being able to make it to the clubhouse. Thanksgiving Dinner plates were made up for those and placed on a table for delivery. I delivered two. The first lady was most grateful and we visited a little while, after which I left for my second delivery. The second lady's name was Elizabeth. I knocked on her door and it took her a little while to answer. When she saw me, she asked who I was. I told her that I was delivering her a plate of Thanksgiving Dinner. She stared at me and asked me why I was doing that, so I explained that I had been in the clubhouse for Thanksgiving Dinner and that since she was not able to get out, a plate had been prepared for her. Elizabeth had suffered a stroke two weeks before and was not feeling well. She was still confused and also very lonely and frightened. She broke into tears and told me that she had just finished praying to God to send someone to help her. She told me about her stroke, her confusion, her loneliness, and her fear. We sat down and talked a little bit and then I asked Elizabeth if I could be her friend and come by and visit her every few days. Elizabeth's whole countenance changed and said that I would be welcome anytime, any day until 6:30 pm because that's when she went to bed. We visited, we prayed, and we hugged. I gave her my phone number to call me anytime because we were now friends and I would be by to visit her whenever I was in town. As I left she hugged me and told me that she loved me. This would be the first time that day when a complete stranger would tell me that they loved me. 

     As I went back to the clubhouse there was one more plate left and that one needed to be delivered to the hospital. I said I would not mind dropping it off and it would give me a chance to visit someone else. I do love people and I do love to talk. So if someone is willing to listen, here I am! They gave me her name and room number and off I went. Her name was Nina.

     As I started to enter her room there was a sign posted on her door and I didn't know what it meant. So I stopped at the nurses station and asked if it was okay if I delivered the plate to her. They said yes. I knocked on the door and entered a dark room. Nina was a 92 year old lady. Nina was dying. Not dying that moment but after being with my mom I know the signs. It would be soon. Nina was also alone and very frightened. As if she had known me for a lifetime, she told me how sick she felt. She told me that she was ready to go home, should the Lord call. And then she told me how alone she was. I held her hand as she spoke, being careful not to touch the bruise caused by the IV and I caressed her face, the same way I had once caressed my own mother's face. I asked Nina if she would like me to feed her that wonderful Thanksgiving Dinner and she said, no, she wasn't hungry. I knew that she would never eat that Dinner, that bringing it to her had just been a gesture of kindness. I stayed with her for a while as I tried to reassure and console her. It seemed as though this would be an impossible task. We talked about God and so many other things. Nina and I became friends that afternoon. We made a deal that day. I told her that when it's my turn to go home that she needs to meet me and show me the ropes up in Heaven. Nina smiled and said that she would be there. Then Nina told me that she loved me, she reached to hug me and gave me a kiss. I kissed her cheek. My friend Nina is still alive as of this writing and I go see her for a little while every day. She recognizes me, tells me she loves me, she kisses me and I kiss her back. She tells me how sick she feels and I hold her hand and caress her face. She tells me that she's ready to go whenever the Lord calls her. I look at her and see that yes, indeed, she is ready to end her suffering and start her new life in Heaven. But she's not quite so lonely anymore. I know that one day I will go to visit her and there will be a made up bed in her room. And I know I will cry and mourn my friend Nina. But I will also be happy, knowing that she is living her new wonderful life in a brand new body. And maybe when I do reach that golden shore, she will be waiting for me along with my mother and grandmother.

     So, in the end, this Thanksgiving turned out to be a wonderful Thanksgiving. I have left old traditions and started new ones. I have a new friend that I will visit at least once a week. And I have a new friend that is about to depart. 

     Thanksgiving, the beginning of the Holiday Season. 'Tis the Season to be jolly! 'Tis the season for presents! 'Tis the season to visit families. 'Tis the season where so many are lonely. “Tis the season where so many are frightened. 'Tis the season where so many are ill. 'Tis the season where so many are dying, alone.

By Luella May©2005

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Deck the Halls Deck the halls with boughs of holly, Fa la la la la la, la la la la. 'Tis the season to by jolly, Fa la la la la la, la la la la. Don we now our gay apparel, Fa la la, la la la, la la la. Troll the ancient Yuletide carol, Fa la la la la la, la la la la.  See the blazing Yule before us, Fa la la la la la, la la la la. Strike the harp and join the chorus. Fa la la la la la, la la la la. Follow me in merry measure, Fa la la, la la la, la la la. While I tell of Yuletide treasure, Fa la la la la la, la la la la.  Fast away the old year passes, Fa la la la la la, la la la la. Hail the new, ye lads and lasses, Fa la la, la la la, la la la. Sing we joyous, all together, Fa la la la la la, la la la la. Heedless of the wind and weather, Fa la la la la la, la la la la.

Do Have A Great Holiday Season
Luella May

©2005