DEE DEE, ANTHONY and APRIL, PRISCILLA, CINDY, HELEN, JANICE, JAIMIE, AND GORDON

These were The Pathfinders, what we called our Sunday School Class. These were my dear friends for three years. They will always live in my heart.

In California, as I attended church, being fairly new, I noticed the two back rows as I walked towards the doors. These two rows held developmentally disabled adults, and two teenagers, twins, Anthony and April. As I walked by I smiled, and I remember the way Priscilla warmly smiled back. Priscilla, bless her heart, is an adult with Downs Syndrome. I knew then, that I wanted to get to know and be involved in this special class.

Little by little, I would visit with them before the church service began. Some did not welcome my friendship, as you must prove you are a true friend and that you are worthy of their trust. But Anthony and April immediately became my friends. Both Anthony and April were unable to speak, although they could hear and understand. I know that Anthony was autistic and I became familiar with the term "flagging." No, I am not referring to when you are exhausted and must get some immediate rest. The term in this instance means that he will at any given time, uncontrollably, raise his hands to either side of his head and shake them vigorously, something like a "Hallelujah" or "Praise the Lord" gesture. As time went on I noticed that he would do this more often if he was upset or nervous, or if he was very happy. April was quiet and calm.

As I developed a relationship with them and they became more and more dear to me, one of the ladies that worked in the Sunday School class suggested that I might want to become involved in this most special ministry. "I thought you'd never ask." was my immediate thought. At first, I became the Song Lady, the helper, the giver of snacks. I noticed immediately that this wonderful group was far more intelligent than anyone really gave them credit for. So, instead of the one song that they would always sing, I took the liberty of introducing more songs. Fun songs. Songs with lots of hand gestures. Actually, they were children's songs, bus kid songs, but they loved them and we had so much fun. Our theme song became..............

"This Little Light of Mine"

I'm gonna let it shine!

This Little Light of Mine

I'm gonna let it shine!

This Little Light of Mine

I'm gonna let it shine!

Let it shine!

Let it shine!

Let it shine!

And we would sing every single verse. No, they wouldn't really sing, they would be happy they would smile, they would raise their index finger and twirl it around. That was our light. After a few weeks I would say, "Okay now! Get your lights out!" And up would go every single index finger. We would sing and all those happy fingers would circle round and round. Then we sang "Potato Chip, Potato Chip!" A munchy crunchy! I love Jesus! A bunchy bunchy! . . . . . And then there was everyone's all time favorite "Baby Shark" "Baby Shark" is always a hit. It never misses. "Baby Shark" is sung every Sunday morning throughout every bus route in the United States and I'm sure some places around the world. That one is a winner and a keeper! I would say, "Get your sharks out!" and with glee they would position their hands with wrists touching, closing their hands and opening them again, mimicking a shark's jaws. Yes, it is quite an unusual song, but so much fun! All except Jaimie. One hand was always closed and drawn to her chest. She also was not able to speak but would understand and smile. During "Baby Shark" she would smile from ear to ear. Anthony would "flag" in happiness and April would go through the motions.

A week or so after I became a helper, their Sunday School Teacher had something come up and couldn't visit them, I volunteered. I was given their addresses and then started a personal relationship that would last for three years, three years that would go by much too quickly. That is when I developed a most caring personal relationship with all of them. Shortly after that, the Sunday School Teacher was unable to teach them, so I became their visitor, their Song Lady, their Sunday School Teacher, and, most of all, their friend.

They were all so special. They lived in group homes and I would visit every Saturday. Some of the residents were not in a position to go to church or their families would not approve, but I grew my class any way I could.

My darling Dee Dee was a lady in her 60's. Dee Dee's disability was caused only by using drugs and, basically, hurting herself mentally. She had also had a very sad and hard life. But now Dee Dee was being taken care of and week after week, she would tell me the very same thing. Every week she would tell me how Jesus straightened out her life. She would tell me what her life had been like, but now she had Jesus and that there was a mansion waiting for her in the sky where one day she would be reunited with her mother. She missed her mother so very much. At that time I really could not understand how she felt but now I do, far too well. Oh I loved Dee Dee and Dee Dee loved me! How we hugged! And when I gave her a few months warning that I was being moved to Mississippi, how we both cried together. Whenever, something was bothering her, she would say, "Lu, I need to talk to you." And we would talk. It was always about the same thing, about how much she missed her mother.

Anthony and April, my special little angels. They couldn't speak, but were always so happy and always had so much love to give. I came to understand them by the motions and sounds they made. They had a special bond between them and loved each other very much. One day in Sunday School, Anthony caught my attention and pointed to his sister April's hair. He was telling me how very pretty she looked and I agreed. She looked so very beautiful. April was a beautiful blond with the most beautiful deep blue eyes, and Anthony was a very handsome young man. Two years later I imagine that they are quite grown up. One Sunday during our class I asked who wanted to pray for someone. The usual group would raise their hands and I would write it on the blackboard. And then something very unusual happened. April raised her hand. I thought, "How am I going to handle this?" I asked April who she wanted to pray for and she uttered the word "Mama." April spoke. At that moment I stood looking at her dumbfounded and I lost control. My eyes filled with tears and I said, "April! You have just said 'Mama!' And with the most happy and proud look she nodded her head. Anthony sat by her with a big smile while he flagged. Crying I ran to the back of the class and gave her the biggest hug. I told her how so very happy and proud I was of her. Every Sunday after that, she would always raise her hand and she would always pray for "Mama."

If you go up and look at the title, you will notice that I did not put Priscilla and Helen together. I did that on purpose as I could never seat them close to each other. Helen would merciless traumatize Priscilla and Priscilla being so very sweet and sensitive would run to me and cry. I would kindly scold Helen and tell her that she needed to be nice to Priscilla. On the days that Helen was nice to Priscilla, she would bring it to my attention, "Hey, I'm being nice to her today." and I would praise her for being so kind and considerate.

Cindy had Downs Syndrome, but she was the cool one of the bunch. She was pretty, felt pretty, was always in style and always needed to be reassured how pretty she was.

And then there was Janice, I didn't gain Janice's trust right away, that took time. However, when I did, we became the best of friends. When I told her that I would be moving in a few months, there was that look of sadness and I believe I noticed a hint of abandonment. Once I gained Janice's trust, she would talk and talk and talk. She would tell me all about her workshop and who made her mad and who had the nerve to do what and one couldn't get a word in edgewise. These were most special conversations.

My Jaimie is next. Jaimie's mom and I became wonderful friends. We still call each other on the phone and share our joys and heartaches. Louise is an exceptional person, she not only took care of Jaimie, but also her husband, who had Parkinson's Disease. Louise and I became the best of friends and I made her my last stop as sometimes we would talk and talk and before I knew it I had been there for literally hours. I miss these visits with my friend Louise. She would always look forward to my arrival where we would talk just about everything. As we talked, Jaimie would always be working a puzzle at the dining room table. She absolutely loved puzzles. A few months after mom died, Louise called me and told me that Harry had been put on Hospice. A couple of months later, she called me to tell me that Harry had died. In the future I will do an article about care giving. Although I believe it is the hardest job in the world, it is almost the most rewarding. Jaimie does not live in a group home. Louise takes care of her, as she took care of Harry all the years that he was ill.

Last but not least, there was Gordon. Such a dear, dear man. Gordon was a man in his sixties but he had the mentality of maybe a six year old. A very dear and sweet six year old. He suffered from arthritis and he would come to me just as a six year old would, point to his elbow and with a tear, just tell me, "It hurts." I would soothe him and tell him it would get better and he would go away happy. Whenever I visited Gordon's group home, he was always watching some type of ball game. He loved ball games. Just as I was preparing for my move to Mississippi, Gordon's arthritis got much worse and he started using a wheelchair. Bless his heart. Whenever I have a bus kid run to me telling me that they have been hurt, I always remember Gordon.

I will tell you one thing. If you ever want to experience true and pure love, get to know these wonderful people. They love you unconditionally and they could certainly teach the world what true love is. I know they taught me things that I could never have learned anywhere else. Because of knowing them and their lessons in life, I believe I am a much better person now.

This was my routine for three wonderful years. Visiting on Saturday, Sunday School on Sundays, with lots of fun and songs. Then one day circumstances beyond my control came about. My husband wanted to move to Mississippi to be with his family. I left all that was dear to me. All in all, my Pathfinders were the hardest of all to say goodbye to. I had the most tears and anxiety over them. I told them a few months in advance, so that they could get used to the idea. There was such sadness, disappointment, and yes I felt as though I was abandoning them. One day I will go back and visit. I have absolutely no doubt that they will remember me. We had a special bond. A bond so special, I believe it goes through time. Maybe one day I will go back and take up where I left off. One never knows. And then maybe it was just part of my journey in life, a small part, but a very important and meaningful part.

These were my Pathfinders. They showed me how to live and how to love. Wherever I go I carry them in my heart, singing, "This Little Light of mine . . . . . "

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I dedicate this music to my friends
DEE DEE, ANTHONY and APRIL, PRISCILLA, CINDY, HELEN, JANICE, JAIMIE, AND GORDON
without whom this article would never have been written.
THIS LITTLE HEART O MINE.midi

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